Thursday, October 15, 2009

The workaholic


Too near yet too far seems the future from where I sit right now. Yes I own that corner cubicle and yes I love that wooden odor emanating from the four feet partition walls.
You'd find me there sitting and in a deeply concentrating mode, with eyes sort of embedded into the computer screen. I look funny..yes I do. But that's how I work. I love being called "the coder", gratifies my soul with food it's been longing for years...
Sometimes when i see that advertisement, where they say what would you remember some years from now, the corner office...the something something,a very dark reality stares me right in my face. Something that work takes away from you, and then this excessive need to "reclaim my life" starts pushing me.
No longer does this guy get his soul food from his work. He wishes to be free. Can't.
Goes back with drooling eyes and again lost in his code trying to debug it make it perfect. Yes, perfect, i seek near perfection in my code. At least something can be made perfect, i know life cant.
Its working!!!, my code, a feat i celebrate in my constantly pushing mind. No one else would realize it,a mere code..hah!
It makes me dream, and am scared turning into a computer myself. I request them not to shut me down..Oh!..thank god.Kinda phobic.
The day nears its timely end...I can see the leaves rustling in the heavy wind...a bit of cloud cover..better rush before it pours.The once romantic droplets don't seem so fascinating now, something has changed, and i regret it has.
Keeping up with deadlines and sticking to routines, life itself has become a untiring loop where "the coder" serves his time.He's happy, he's sad..he's a workaholic...

Thursday, February 19, 2009

..The Winters I crave for...


Looking through the window pane, the sunshine still so warm. Even the setting sun could overwhelm the eyes,and there I was dreaming....
Was it the winters of my home that I yearn for...
Was it the warmth of love that made the longing even more irresistible...
But then there is a reality, the one we face everyday,every passing moment. It makes the dreams look vague,overriding every nuance of virtual freedom that dreams provide to us.
Coming to think of it..most part of life is superficial...so unreal but still we survive..and each one of us..
The reality is in things like..a mother's love...can never be fake...its one thing am not afraid to dream...
Something just compels me to write..this is real...though certain thoughts that may come out,on the contrary,may be unreal..
Dreams can be so complete in them sometimes, one wishes the world remain forever..
The winters in my dreams..still give me shivers..that no sunlight can undo...
The November winds still shower their sweet smell...it's so good to be home...
This dream turned reality...for once...I crave for reality...though the dream can last lifetime..the reality would fade...
These winters are a food for my thoughts..they love being locked..love being exclusive..for once i let 'em out...let 'em taste the sun...let 'em feel the winter winds...
For eventually the reality would lay them to sleep...and it'll be like an eternity when they again get to feel the same virtual freedom...Ah life..n its quizzical forms...so incomprehensible...so admirable...
And I lay here...looking outside...to the winters i crave for...and to the sun that I live in..