This post is dedicated to "me"......since no one else would do it so i thought i do it myself.
I am currently an engineering student and this is my account of a life i thought i'd have in my own colors but as its always destined to be,someone else,someone above,a mightier power always has his way.
I grew up with the general idea every mother instills in her child.."you are a very intelligent boy". So naturally cracking the IIT exam became a chain with a metal ball tied to the feet,u have to carry the burden wether u want it or not coz "everyone will be so pleased,if u make it through"....wether you will be pleased or not ..who cares a damn.
Spent thousands on coaching,and i always knew something wasn't right and things were not going my way but to break a million hearts..i decided let the one be my own.
But one confession i'd make, may be i didn't try hard enough.............
Then came the days...the entrance exam days and each paper written created a new illusion of achieving success until the result was contrary......................."a million hearts broke"!
Scoring a 90% in 12th and tried for st. Stephens (D.U. college),frankly i liked the atmos. but the idea of a B.Sc. was not very enchanting......"Beggars are not choosers" is the thought that came to that tumultuous mind. There was an interview one has to clear before the final merit list is out...i had applied for BSc. computer science since i had 99/100 in the mark sheet.
The guy above again had his way,and though the interview went well yet......only 25 out of 300 students were chosen. Preference: the so emphasised "backward and neglected class"....the rest can go an might as well bang their heads on whichever wall that pleases them.
The look on my dad's face when i didn't make it...yet all were there for me....why? they cared so much...was i the one who didn't care???
Finally got through an engineering college,not worth mentioning the name coz u might have never heard of it... Leading a much settled life now when i look back at those days when trips to delhi from my hometown dehradun were so frequent yet resultless..it inflicts a greater pain,drowns a greater soul..how i put down the hopes of all....One thing i realised in the process "The whole world will be on your side when you succeed but once you trip over its only your parents to lend you a helping hand"...
Enjoying college life now,its better than school with good friends around still the heart is a loner...seems that just cant fill this void.
So this was me,my life...hope it goes much better now coz I take my own decisions now so i no longer blame no one.
